Scales of Justice

Today marks week 6 of my promised exercise routine.  I have not faltered for an entire six weeks and have been ever so faithful to my workout regimen. My sister asked me how much weight I have lost since I started my fantastic walking program.  I told her it must be LOADS and LOADS of weight. I mean I walked today and the heat index was over 100*. The sheer heat of the day should make the pounds melt off.  I walked yesterday in the big deep scary woods all alone. The sheer terror of the walk should scare the pounds off.  I walked in the early morning hours. The sheer energy it takes to get moving at that hour should burn the pounds off.  I walked late at night. The sheer devotion to getting up after dinner and walking past sunset should motivate the pounds off. I told my sister I would go check the scales and get back with her.  The news had to be so incredibly fabulous that I can't believe I hadn't thought to check my scale before she called! So up the stairs I went.  I have an old fashioned doctor type scale with the sliding weights.  My weight was near the end of the slide - still stuck there from the end of the winter doldrums.  I couldn't wait to slide my weight to the left! I got on. Teeter. Totter. Teeter. Man the suspense.  I am so ready to slide my weight! Teeter. Totter.......level. As in EXACTLY the SAME.  As in not one pound. Not one ounce. Nothing. NET ZERO! WAHHHHHHHHH!  I am certain my butt is at least HALF the size it was before I started walking!  My scale must be broken. My very dependable, most excellent scale obviously is playing a very nasty trick on me and has broken beyond repair.  My younger daughter says that her weight is just fine on the scale.  Oh Okay.  So the scale has a vendetta against me personally. I see.  Maybe the scale is mad because I haven't visited it lately.  Maybe it got lonely and is taking out its frustrations by REFUSING TO BUDGE. Mean scale!!!!  I am very sure that my lack of weight loss is NOT at all due to the yummy strawberries and whipped cream (and maybe a chocolate chip or two) because strawberries are fruit and fruit is good for you.  So that doesn't count. I am very sure that my lack of weight loss is not due to my love of chocolate because I read that chocolate is an antioxidant - so therefore  - it is good for you and a must have. Haagan Dazs Amaretto Almond Crunch ice cream is a DAIRY product. It has loads of calcium and protein. So that is DEFINITELY not the reason. I am also very sure that my weight loss is NOT due to my new found lovely lunch menu which is the best pasta ever.  Get a hot skillet, heat up some olive oil, a bit of garlic, garlic salt, cayenne pepper, fresh halved cherry tomatoes and the juice of one lemon.  Get it piping hot and then toss in some angel hair pasta. mmmmmm.  I eat it several times a week - but again....tomatoes are a vegetable. Lemon is a fruit.  Garlic keeps away vampires.  ANGEL hair pasta is angelic - and everyone knows angels are good - so what gives???  Tonight's menu calls for homemade cherry pie (with fresh cherries). See? Fruit! I couldn't be eating any better.  I think it is time to find a scale that isn't holding a grudge because obviously I am WAY skinnier than I was 6 weeks ago.  My scale just doesn't want to see the plain truth that is staring it right in the face: I am fabulously thin. My scale just doesn't want to admit it.