Torture!

I am being tortured!  Really! TORTURED!  When I tell you my tale of woe - you probably won't think it sounds that awful, but I am telling you it is really really HORRIBLE and I am in complete and utter misery! So my story starts about 3 nights ago when I ate a delicious salad that had toasted pine nuts on it.  It was scrumptious.  I love pine nuts and never thought of putting them on a salad.  They are really good that way!  Then on Monday night, I made pasta with artichoke hearts, fresh cherry tomatoes, a little lemon and some freshly toasted pine nuts.  Again, DELICIOUS!  I had seconds!  Monday night, I started having a really bad taste in my mouth.  I couldn't get rid of it.  When I woke up on Tuesday it was MUCH worse.  No matter what I did, this acrid, bitter, metallic HORRIBLE AWFUL NO GOOD taste in my mouth would not go away.  I ate some of my artichoke pasta with the pine nuts for lunch and didn't even enjoy it.  After I was done, it was like the horrible taste in my mouth was magnified a million times.  As the day wore on, I could barely drink water it was so bad. Nothing would relieve my misery. It is as if I have the white rind off of a grapefruit stuck in my mouth. I mean a big huge piece of white pithy grapefruit rind and you are forced to chew it all day long. So I decided that I would go to the doctor first thing in the morning and beg her to help me.  That is how bad it is!  Before I went to bed, I got online and started researching just what in the heck is afflicting me. Do you know what I found??!!  Do you know what "serious" disease I have? It is called "Pine Mouth". Yes that is right. PINE MOUTH.  It is caused by eating PINE NUTS! Honestly!  Evidently some people have an adverse reaction to eating pine nuts which causes the taste buds to produce an AWFUL taste that lasts 5-14 DAYS.  Nothing will relieve it. So many people wrote how they couldn't eat or drink anything for days on end due to the overwhelming bitter acrid taste in their mouth. It is all you can think about.  Despite the fact we ALL ate the pasta, I am the only one to suffer from Pine Mouth. Everything tastes awful. My coffee is yucky, my peanut butter and jelly bagel is yucky. I cannot enjoy orange juice or water or marshmallows or chocolate or lollipops or gum or ANYTHING. Ugh.  And of course if you look at me, I am fine, so no one is really thinking how sad they are for me. Evidently the most vile taste in your mouth is INVISIBLE to everyone, so I just suffer in silence.  Poor me and my pine mouth. *sniff sniff*