Monday, March 22, 2010

Grocery Store Run

Late last night I had to make a run to the grocery store as we were "GASP" out of ORANGE JUICE! I hadn't realized the extreme importance of having orange juice in the refrigerator at ALL times - day or night - but evidently one of my beloved family members was very close to meeting DOOM if I didn't run and replenish our stock. Orange Juice is just one of the things we buy in mass quantities. We actually consume between 8-10 gallons of milk EVERY WEEK. Yes, there are now only four people living in this house and yet, we manage to drink gallons upon gallons of milk. Without fail each week upon greeting the cashier I hear "Wow, That's a lot of milk! Do you drink that much?" Usually I am kind and say something sweet like, "Yes, we love milk! It goes great with cookies" or something to that effect. Once in a while I throw in a "NOPE - I take a bath in it, it does wonders for my complexion" or "No, I am doing a scientific research project on the shelf life of milk - I am betting 2 weeks before it starts to smell." You get the picture. So I picked up my three gallons of Orange Juice and 15lbs of Peanut Butter. I like to buy the big 5 gallon SUPER size peanut butter cans and of course you should buy at least 3 because heaven forbid we run out of peanut butter!!! And with my lovely cart full of OJ and PB, I proceeded to the cashier. Yes, I was asked if I liked Peanut Butter and yes I was tempted to say that I like to use it for facials but I was remarkably good given the late hour. As I was leaving the store I happened to walk by the Ice Freezer where they sell large bags of ice cubes and I noticed a sign on the door. It said, "HEALTHIER THAN HOMEMADE". I actually did a double take as I was sure I read the sign incorrectly. "Healthier than HOMEMADE?" Are you serious? OH NO!!! Have I been cheating my family all these years with my painstakingly made by hand ICE Cubes when I should have been using the HEALTHY ICE all this time??? EGAD! Where have I gone wrong?! I never realized that my zero calorie, zero nutritional content HOMEMADE frozen water was lacking! The grocery store has HEALTHY ice!!! Ice with.....zero calories and zero nutritional content but somehow destined to make us feel better and become healthier human beings. I feel shame. I must apologize to my family. I must apologize to my doggies. They love ice cubes in their water bowls during the hot summer months and I have only been giving them HOMEMADE ice. Sniff sniff. I wonder how many others have been unknowingly consuming....HOMEMADE ICE?! I hope we will all be able to recover from our serious nutritional deficit.

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