Friday, September 30, 2011

Looking Up

I am happy to report that our yellow jacket numbers are greatly decreasing! Today our total count of yellow jackets killed in our home is ... eleven.  11!  That is amazing.  This is from over 300+ earlier in the week. Yesterday we still killed over 100 bees in our home, so 11 is AWESOME.  I mean awesome in that I only had to kill 11 bees, not awesome in that ELEVEN bees still found there way into my home and were secretly lurking awaiting their mutant lethal attack.  Mr. Yesteryear Acres and I are still sleeping downstairs on the couches.  Did you know that if you sleep on the couch, your back is EXACTLY in the correct position for a COLD WET DOG NOSE to nudge you?  I bet you didn't know that. I bet you didn't think about the one moment you were actually sleeping on the couch, is the exact moment your doggie would like you to know it is staring at you. Nudge. Nudge.  "HELLO HUMAN! YOU ARE SLEEPING ON THE COUCH! HI!" Of course the doggie doesn't want anything.  Just to say hello.  Such a good doggie.  Who doesn't love cold nose nudges at 2:00am? Did you also know that Mr. Yesteryear Acres is merely keeping me company each night?  He is NOT too afraid to sleep upstairs. Noooooooo. He doesn't want me to be alone. Isn't that sweet? I asked him if he were going to sleep upstairs tonight and he said no. He doesn't think I am quite ready for that. Awwwww. He is so thoughtful.  We won't at all mention that he is secretly thinking he doesn't want to be snuggling in bed with a bunch of yellow jackets. We will let him continue to protect me downstairs.  I have to say that the distance between the 2 couches does make the sound of his thundering snoring go from let's say the sound of a 747 to that of a small jet so that is a plus.  Another plus is that I learned that one should NOT make homemade apple crisp if one's house is being invaded by yellow jackets. See?  I have saved you from thinking that is a smart idea, even though you probably already made the connection that peeling fresh picked apples is not a wise and intelligent thing to do in a house full of bees. I had to learn the hard way.  I did finish the job and of course it was delicious BUT believe me when I say - that is the one and only time I will make my family apple crisp in a house full of bees.  Enough said on that subject.  Please do not ridicule me for not having the forethought of bees and apples - bad combo.  Lesson Learned. I also have GREATLY increased my eye/hand coordination. I can swing a badminton racket and kill a bee in seconds flat.  I think Wimbledon may be calling me. I am just that good. The other bright side into things are looking up is somehow the puppies all escaped the yellow jacket horror.  The puppies are on the other side of the house and managed to all escape sting-free.  The only doggie to suffer was Olive and she recovered quickly.  She also decided that she would no longer chase the bees in the house.  Lesson Learned for Olive.  We are all just SO much smarter now.  I guess I have to thank the thoughtful bees for invading my home and giving me a terror-filled week. Now that the humming is slowing down, I appreciate silence more than ever before. Let's hope that tomorrow is buzz free!

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