Friday, May 7, 2010

Counting the Days

Lately I find myself counting the days. Counting the days until I no longer have to stalk the mail carrier. Counting the days until I see my older daughter. Counting the days until the school year is finished. Counting the days until my son is off for his STEM adventure at the Naval Academy. Counting the days until our bedroom renovations are finally done and we can move back upstairs. And of course counting the days until SUMMER TIME which means family fun, visiting my dad's lake cottage and enjoying every day the kids are home. In all the business of counting the days, I think I almost forgot to count THIS day. The day I am having right now. To spend days looking forward to things that are on the horizon, means perhaps missing the moments that are happening right now. I am very good at following my advice when it comes to thinking about worrisome things or bad news or events you hope never come true. I try to follow the philosophy of never worrying about things until it is necessary to worry about them. The dreaded doctor report that you are certain will bring despair. The job you hope a loved one gets. The confrontation you hope to never have. The test, the class, the project, the obstacle, etc. a loved one is trying to pass. All of these type things can bring worry and sleepless nights. Have you ever spent endless days worrying, waiting for news from a doctor? Dreading a phone call yet anxious with worry every minute until you hear the phone ring? Have you ever stopped to think about how much energy was wasted worrying about what was going to happen? All those minutes, hours, days and weeks spent thinking and worrying will never come back to you. You will never have those days back again. Worrying certainly didn't change the outcome - whether it was good news or bad. It only changed how you spent your days up until the time the news arrived. I have spent many sleepless nights only to find out the very thing I was so worried about NEVER came to pass. So yes, I try very hard to not worry until I know I need to worry. Until I have the answer in my hand that says YES THIS IS 100% BAD - I try with all my might not to think of those worries. Waiting until the time mandates that you deal with a problem will give you so many more days of pleasure. Living in the here and now makes you focus on what THIS day brings that is good and happy. I thought of that very thing today and stopped myself from counting all the days that are on the way. I realized I almost missed the good day that is happening now. So today my day brought sunshine and warm weather for the puppies to enjoy. I watched my husband take a break from working and let the puppies crawl all over him with joy. This evening, I took a walk with my husband and fed the fish in our pond and we remembered how hard we worked to construct our pond and marveled at all the fish thriving in our little peace of heaven. We watched the wind ripple across the hay fields barely touching the tops, making waves as if the field were an emerald ocean. The waves dance across the hay fields, one after the other, and it is easy to get lost in the beauty of nature. I am grateful for all of these things and more. Cherish each day. You only had one chance to appreciate all that May 7, 2010 had to offer so make sure that May 8th is memorable and take time to find something special that only May 8th will bring.

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